A Reflection on the Preschooler's Cheeks

My son has the cutest cheeks ever. I realized this as we were getting out of the car to check the mail today. The sweetest curve, the smoothest skin, the nibbliest texture. No day is so bad that it can't be fixed by watching those cheeks bunch up into a great big smile. Even if his cheeks are damp and sweaty for a hard day of playing, or even a bit gritty and dirty from said day, they are still kissable and soothing. Even when he pulls that perfect roundness flat with an I-Don't-Want-To frown, they are perfect and sweet (although slightly less endearing). <3

You Can't Make This Up ...

The past year has been ... interesting. I've embraced that old saying that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I tell jokes that I could have my own daytime soap opera (except there'd be a lot less sex). And I have a lot of people telling me I should write a book. Seeing as I am a writer, writing a book is obviously something that appeals to me. It could be cathartic, and I'm pretty sure that most people would find it pretty funny ... and make them thankful that they're not me!

But I'm not sure where to begin. My 1,000+ mile move? My divorce? Or back further, to my wedding reception, where my bouquet ended up in the chandelier and several of the table decorations burst into flames? Or back even further, to my childhood in an underground house and naked rubber chicken show-and-tell escapades?

Getting Organized ... the Saga

Have you ever had that conversation about the ways you don't want to die? You know, after watching something like Titanic. Drowning? Nah, that would suck. Freezing to death? Might be better than drowning, but still, I'll pass. Pretty much anything short of passing peacefully in my sleep is not high on my list.

Death by paperwork is, again, pretty far down on the list of ways I'd like to die. So that's one of the many reasons why I'm trying to reign in my home's paper tide before it becomes a tsunami. The boy probably wouldn't mind so much: while his current obsession is cars, before cars, it was paper. Anything made out of paper. And he's convinced that yours truly can make anything out of paper. He seriously tested my origami abilities. I'm enjoying this cars respite, but I know paper is in our future. He's dependable, my boy.

So building my life raft (not out of paper!) is my first goal for the new year. I've moved an old microwave cart into my foyer to help corral all the paper as it comes in. And while I fully intend to deal with the paper as soon as it crosses my threshold, I'm also designating Monday and Thursday evenings as Paperwork Party (ie, shred, toss and file nights). I live a wild life, let me tell you. Meh, it's better than drowning! My last step is making a convenient, easily accessible home for those pieces I need to keep. Any suggestions?

Welcome 2012!

2012 is going to be my year. I'm ready to shake the dust of 2011 from my toes and start dancing in 2012. So, in honor of the new year, here are the goals I'm setting for myself:

Get Organized

As a newly single mom, I have learned that there just isn't enough time in the day to get everything done. To get as much done as humanly possible, I need to be smart about my time and and my expectations, and I need to get all the help I can by putting the things I need a fingertip away every time. So, first things first:

• Time study. For one week, I'm going to track my time to see how I spend each waking minute. I've actually set a tentative daily, weekly and monthly routine for myself, but now I want to fine tune them to see where I can cram in a few more to-dos.
• Reevaluate. My internal Southern Living editor and I are going to have a heart-to-heart on exactly how neat I keep my home. Yes, I would love to have a magazine-ready home, but between a full-time job, a very active preschooler and a limited amount of space, I'm not sure how feasible that goal is. So we're going to do a little giving and taking here.
• Invest. If there is a tool out there that will help me get and keep my home and life organized, I am going to save my money and buy it. And use it. And tell you all about it! : )

Get Healthy

One of the reasons I want to get organized is so I can find more time to take care of myself (which makes staying organized easier ... it's a lovely symbiotic relationship I've got going on here). Another one of the reasons? A lovely, smart and very active preschooler who is challenging mom to keep up. Challenge accepted!

• Eat better. I will find easy-to-make, quick, healthy dinners that the boy will actually eat. (And they will not be the same three meals over and over and over.) We will have a fruit and/or vegetable with every meal. Every single meal and snacks too!
• Drink more water. I am going to use the next quarter to wean myself off of Diet Coke. I like Diet Coke. But water is better for me, and it's free.
• Do something active every day. Even if it's only 10 push-ups in the morning, I will do something active every day. Ideally, the boy and I will do it together, but "ideal" is rarely a word that describes my life, so we're going to figure it out!

Have Fun!

Fun is not a word that figured into my life a lot in 2011. I was simply trying to struggle through, keep my head above water and grieve for my marriage (it's amazing how hard and sad even the right decision can be). This year I want to add a little more fun in there. I like smiling. I feel better when I laugh. And I want the boy to see a mom who is healthy and happy.

• I will take the time to do one thing a month just for fun, just for me.
• I will call my friends and family often to laugh and chat and listen and not talk about me the entire time.
• I will revisit the things I used to enjoy doing to find out if I still enjoy them.
• I will find a way to make music part of my life again.
• I will invest in glitter. Glitter makes everything better!

So what do you think? Feel like coming along for the ride? I hope so — see you in 2012!

You Know You're a Mom When ...

This story is about underwear. About finding a pair of my underwear in the center console of my car ...

With that kind of an introduction, you would think this story involves entirely too much fun: maybe too much alcohol, almost definitely one of those guys you know is just such a bad idea. But that would be if you had a free-wheeling, single life. So I can tell you right now, my story is much less exciting but probably much more amusing.

So here goes.

The reason a pair of my underwear is lurking in my center console is because my 3-year-old son has almost conquered potty training. Potty training — for those parents who've not yet gone through it and for those who are far enough away to be able to laugh at those messy, messy memories — is both messy and unpredictable. The boy and I are in the latter stages of potty training. We've gotten the hang of going on the potty. Really! It's the aiming/wiping bit that we still struggle with. I say "we" because when he has a mishap, guess who gets to clean up? Oh yeah, that'd be me.

Being the overly prepared parent that I try to be, I go everywhere — restaurants, grocery stores and play dates — with extra clothes. I was getting us ready for church (yes, the story about my underwear involves church. And yes, I do realize how very, very wrong that is.) and throwing everything into my purse: toys, clothes for the boy, snacks for the boy, a drink for the boy who gets thirsty after eating his snacks, wipes for messes on the boy, paper towels for messes made by the boy, a plastic bag for clothes that get peed on, my tithe from two weeks ago (which is a whole other blog post) ... pretty much everything I think I might possibly need and a few extras for good measure.

It wasn't until we got to church that I realized, wrapped up in the boy's clothes, was a pair of my own undies. Rather than take those into church and pop out at a really inconvenient time (just imagine ... or, rather, don't), I tossed them into my center console.

So simple. So not exciting. But they're STILL THERE. I rediscovered them the other night as I was meeting a few friends out for dinner and immediately threw them back into the console. Story told, story laughed at, story forgotten. And the undies are, again, STILL THERE. Maybe it's because I'm hoping to run into that such-a-bad-idea guy one day. Or maybe (and more likely) it's because I'm juggling the boy, a pack with enough supplies to last us through the next blizzard (or potty training mishap, whichever comes first), groceries and a never-ending to-do list to prepare for my next adventure in mommy-dom. Yeah, I'm thinking that last bit might be it.

Blog Tinkering

I'm a tinkerer. I love to fiddle with things: to tweak, revise, adjust until I get it just right ... for a while, and then I start tinkering again. Sometimes that's a good thing, and sometimes things go slightly amiss. As is the case with my blog. I did some tinkering a few days ago that may have killed about a year's worth of posts. We'll see. I'm going to do some more tinkering to see if I can't get them back. In the meantime, here's hoping this batch of tinkering works!

Identity Crisis

Last year, I got serious about starting my freelance writing biz. I've been fortunate to have contract work that's been keeping us fed, clothed, housed and all that good stuff, but I realized that relying on one client was short-sighted, especially since I would prefer to continue working from home. So, I got serious.
I incorporated my biz (SZC Communications), started some marketing stuff, reached out to former colleagues, joined professional groups, hit the social media sphere (blogging included, although I know I've been neglecting this one. The good stuff is at The Pink Pen Blog!), all the stuff that you're supposed to do. And I started reading. Lots and lots of reading.
And I keep reading, "Find and own your niche." My niche. What on earth is my niche? I've been a specialist in being a generalist for almost a decade now! What do I write about? Senior health, Alzheimer's disease, personal finance, marketing, adventure vacations, gardening, communications, publishing, social media, science, environmental issues... see my drift?
I like the variety. I like being the Queen of Random Trivia (because yes, after all those years writing about all those topics, I am the Queen of Random Trivia. Ask my husband).
So drilling down to find my niche has been hard. I do sometimes feel as though I'm going through an identity crisis. Which me is the most marketable? Sigh. I guess I'll figure it out one of these days!